Waiting

       You may be wondering what we have decided to use for an adoption agency.  Well....I contacted an agency in Bloomington and one in Chicago, both had some news we would have preferred not to hear.  They both told us that in the state of Illinois both the husband and the wife have to be 21 years old in order to adopt.  In actuality we would not be able to adopt a child until after I turn 21 because the home study etc. would take that long to complete but both agency's told me that they would not even work with us until we were both 21.  Jesse is 21 almost 22 but as some of you may know I am only 20 until December.  We thought we had covered any age requirements with the agency in Peoria that we met with and we both took it that our age would not be a problem.   I guess there was a misunderstanding.  I have contacted our social worker in Peoria to see if this was really a law. She told me that in Illinois you have to hold a foster family license to adopt a baby through an agency and you have to be 21 to hold a foster family license. (Illinois has some of the most strict adoption laws) She said that she thinks that this could be worked with but since the other agencies said it couldn't she wasn't sure.  She was going to a meeting last Friday the 23rd to get a straight answer.  She also told us that for the Court System we would have to be 21 but we wouldn't need that until the actual adoption which wouldn't be until I was 21 anyways.  So anyways, we are waiting to hear back from the Peoria agency as to whether or not we can begin the home study process now or we will have to wait until December.
       Aside from the fact that the agencies in Bloomington and Chicago will not work with us until we are 21 we have decided against both of these agencies even if we do have to wait until December.
       I talked to a very nice social worker from Bloomington but the actual agency gave me a unsettling feeling, unlike the one in Peoria.  I was told that we would have to be open to any level of openness that the birth mother would choose and we would not really be able to share our preference.  Jesse and I are not totally against some level of openness with the birth mother but to put that completely up to the birth mother makes us a little nervous.  We do not want a child that we adopt to feel like they have two mothers.  After talking with this agency I got the feeling that their agency has a set way of doing things and they do not like to change that if you are looking to do something a little different.  It left me feeling very unpeaceful and therefore we have chosen not to go with the Bloomington agency.
       Chicago's agency is very large.  Therefore they have less time to be personal.  To begin their process we would have to fill out an application then if we are accepted we would be put on a wait list with about 9 other families.  This list is of families waiting to begin the home study process.  The wait time for this list is usually about a year.  That would mean it would be a year until we could even begin the home study and then about 3-6 months until we finish that and become a waiting family having our profile shown to bith mothers.  Comparing this to Peoria where we could begin right away on the home study(unless we have to be 21) we feel like Chicago is not the route we would like to go.
       Having said all that I think it is safe to say we have decided to use FamilyCore in Peoria as the adoption agency for our Home study and hopefully our placement.